Lucie (Surrey)

There are no words to describe losing a sibling at such a young age; and this loss is even more tragic because I know with the right support my big sister’s passing could have been avoided. If she’d received the perinatal mental care she needed after her son’s birth, she would still be here today.

But in the UK, the sad reality is that many new mums are suffering with perinatal mental health issues on their own. Statistically, depression and anxiety affects 15 to 20% of women in the first year after childbirth, but many cases of perinatal depression and anxiety still go undetected.

Mental health is still taboo

As a young mum, I’ve witnessed this prevalence first hand. A few weeks ago, I looked around the small toddler group I attend and realised there were at least three mums who had spoken to me about their perinatal mental health issues, and they were just the ones who had confided in me.

Unfortunately, in our culture, mental health remains a taboo that we feel the need to hide and often have secret internal battles with. But if the mums I meet every week didn’t have to put on a brave face and knew they weren’t the only person in the room struggling, they’d all have an immediate support network.

We must push for change

As well as getting more people to talk about mental health before and after birth, it’s vital all women in the UK who experience perinatal mental illness receive the care they and their families need. I know if it was me who had died, Emma would have tirelessly pushed for this change.

That’s why I wanted to share my story and wholeheartedly support the Everyone’s Business campaign. For me, Emma’s death should not be in vain. We owe it to her and her son to prevent the mental ill health of other pregnant and postnatal women going unrecognised, undiagnosed and untreated.

If the content of this story causes you to think of anything that has happened to you or someone you know and you feel upset, worried or uncomfortable, please see our support page for a list of services who may be able to help.